It's Friday. Sex?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
