Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
