Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
