worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
