maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
