How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
