I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
