Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
kristin has been a bad kristin
my sisters under your porch take her home
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
