He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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