Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
We got so high we made milksteak
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
