No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
