thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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