My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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