This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
