I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
