I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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