mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
