I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize