but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
