hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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