yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
