Ambien. No doubt about it.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
