So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
