i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
