I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
