thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Oh god it's open bar.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
