my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
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