I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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