ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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