Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
