Your face is a jimmy john
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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