just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize