Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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