My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
