ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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