Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
