Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize