Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize