I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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