WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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