she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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