What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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