He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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