God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
