sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
