She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
