i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
