Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize