This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
