Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Just pee around me
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
