why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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