giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I intend to get homeless drunk
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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